There’s this girl at my brother’s high school, and he’s crazy about her. She’s a cheerleader, captain of the debate team and winner of last year’s Miss Orange County.
My brother has coke-bottle glasses and takes computers apart for fun.
Yup, real girl magnet… Not.
But he really likes this chick, and he wants to take her to the prom, so as his older sister and resident romantic, it’s my duty to make his dream come true.
I wasn’t sure how to do it. Bribery didn’t seem like the way to go. Threats could get me in trouble with the parental units. I talked to my friends and my co-workers, but nothing.
Then I saw an awards show on TV. There was Robert Pattinson climbing out of a limo, waving at his screaming fans, and I knew just what to do.
Hire a limo.
Now I know a limo isn’t going to make my brother look like Robert Pattinson. He’ll still be his same pasty self who likes to talk techy. But no girl can ignore a nice, lean limo driven by a chauffeur. If he rides up in one of those to ask her out, no girl in her right mind will say no. I mean, even if he makes her gag, she’s got to want to take a sweet ride in a limousine, right?
So here’s the plan. My brother nabs some daisies from the flower shop down the street from his school. The limo picks him up at the flower shop corner. He arrives at the school right when his cutie pie is getting out of cheerleading practice. He hands her the flowers and asks her to the prom. She says yes. Mission accomplished.
Aren’t I the best sister ever?
I just had to find a limo that I could afford on the tips I pick up at my college’s coffee house. I’m a romantic, but a poor romantic. I called around to a few places, and surprisingly, limos don’t have to be expensive as you think. The customer service rep was totally cool when I said I had a smallish budget. I just have to make sure my dweeb brother snags his girl in under two hours, and this coup will be more affordable than I would have thought possible.
Oh, and the deal includes limo service for prom night. Sweet!
So the proposal went off without a hitch. My brother remembered to hand over the daisies, and the cheerleader said yes to the prom.
There’s just one problem. My brother is suddenly the most popular guy in school. All these girls keep calling him and tying up the phone line. “Is Charles there? When will he be back? Can I leave my number?” Sheesh.
My poor brother doesn’t know what to do, but at least he’ll have a great prom story to tell his children.
Not that Charles owes me anything, but he’d better get me a limo ride for my graduation. I’m just saying.
Sabung Ayam
Uffie – Hot Chick
LYRICS:
On my way to Miami
I see all kind of freak
From icky-sticky bitches
To fetish friendly tricks
When I go out
Some like get me drunk and wild
But the only thing you get tonight
Is my fucking drink tab
Yes I’m like
Hot chick that you can’t even touch
Im like this cold ass bitch and
I ain’t ready to suck
Uffie is here the boys are screaming
And the club is packed
And this one is for all my ladies
Who like to shake it like that
So get your ass on the floor
Down to the floor
Take your ass on the floor
Down to the floor
Take your ass on the floor
Down to the floor
Take your ass on the floor
Down to the floor
Take your ass on the floor
Down to the floor
Tap your funky dancing shoes
I cant hear I want more
Don’t you stop
Yes I want to see you’re getting hot
Uffie has got the hottest tracks
And the shit on lock
You’ve got me
Kick up the sounds
So I’m tearing this sound
and you can spin a little faster
I still rippin this song
They call me uff
Yes Im young but I ain’t givin a fuck
If you got beef I thought you knew
I am ready to fuck, oh
It cant be stopped, no
We stop the rock
So viciously that you dont even want us to stop
I came to dance and shake on this t-t-t-techno shit
But it sound a little fresher when uffie rock the b-b-b-b-b-beat
In the club
I am tired to hear the same techno shit
With all the dancing crap
Its just a road of hits
Where as the sound I like to hear
That keep me shaking my ass
I like an electronic beat
With a vocal that kick ass
I’ve groovin’ in the USA
Cause my first track is like a commercial for NRA
But I feel great rocking Europeans on this club scene
I put my dirty plot out there cause it is too fucking clean
And thats right
Have another drink
I want to party hard
Maybe roll out the fucking weed
We gonna party hard
Till the sunrise
We gonna get all sticky n shit
But you dont care as long as me and dj feats drop the heat
I’m like hot chick
That you can’t even touch
I’m, I’m like hot chick
That you can’t even touch
I’m, I’m like hot chick
That you can’t even touch…
SNAP!