Just about everyone is on the receiving end of a breakup at some point in their lives. It can be debilitating to be broken up with and even if you do the breaking up it can be just as painful. There is a way how to survive a breakup though, you can do it. All you have to do is follow these tips.
There are a number of ways that you can get over a breakup and one of the first steps is to embrace your pain. The emotions that you are going through are perfectly natural, by admitting to them, then you have ownership over them and prevent them from owning you. Sure, spend a few days eating copious amounts of chocolate ice-cream in your pajamas, but recognize that it is part of a process and not going to become your normal state of being – in time you will feel whole again.
The next thing to do is call on your friends for help. You need a support network to help you through tough times and your friends will be more than happy to help you through a tough time. It might involve too many mojitos, shopping trips, movie nights watching chick flicks or any other activity, but they will help you out no end.
Another step of moving on is to get your feelings out. Screaming or crying into your pillow or watching sad old movies is a good move. Writing a letter to your ex and letting all your feelings rip no matter how ugly they are is very liberating. Don’t hold back about it – make sure you get the last word in about everything… Then rip it up or burn it. Whatever you do, do not send it no matter how tempted you are. Afterwards you will feel much better as it helps to get some of the pain out from inside you.
Next, change your focus from your ex and what went wrong and refocus your attention on you. Make a lifestyle overhaul and get yourself involved in some new past times or activities. Try dance classes, learning to paint, learn a language or whatever it is that you are mildly interested in. Indulge in a little self love and shout yourself a new wardrobe, hair do and nails. All of this will keep you busy, distracted and also help to rebuild your self-esteem and self worth.
Exercise is a very good idea as not only do you become a whole lot hotter all of a sudden, it also releases endorphins, which are happy hormones. These will help to improve your take on life and help drag you out of the doldrums. Suddenly looking awesome in a pair of hotpants though does go an awfully long way to restoring your happiness.
Okay, now let’s get serious for a second. Do not contact your ex. This is really important, so we will repeat it again: do not contact your ex! Cut off all contact as this will only drag out the pain and make you miserable as well as making you look desperate, which is never a good look.
After a time you might be able to become friends or at least civil towards each other. You never know, you might even get back together, but you can only think about that when you have taken the time to get some perspective on things. How to survive a breakup is a question of self love, discipline and realizing that the emotions and pain are part of the healing process.
It’s oblique but it’s all there
'The most I can do is try to repeat what took place in a different zone in mental terms, trying to distinguish between what made up a part of that sudden conglomeration in its own right and what other associations might have become incorporated into it parasitically.' – Julio Cortazar, 62: A Model Kit More and more my memory and experience of works is coloured by the places and the people with whom I encountered them. This screening brings together works that have been important to me over the last few years selected from places where I have lived for a time and where I have filmed myself. The screening features works from Thailand, Hong Kong, USA, Mexico, Taiwan, the Philippines and Aotearoa New Zealand interspersed with fragments from my ongoing project Untitled (Eyemo rolls) shot in these various countries since I began travelling with an Eyemo 35mm film camera in 2011. Each work is drawn from a particular geography but also blurs the line between them. The project is a way to think about entanglement and the cinema as a locality between places. The selected films speak to particular places but also to the memory of them, to subculture's reclaiming of space or the resistant occupation. The works are drawn from each of these locations, but often they blur the line between them; Thai artist Apichatpong Weerasethakul's 011-66-43-225-059 was made when he was home sick while studying in Chicago, Chick Strand's Guacamole was made in Mexico during her periodic trips there from her home in Los Angeles. The films speak to particular places but also to the memory of them, subcultural's reclaiming space or resistance to occupation from Mok Chiu-yu's iconoclastic Letter to the Young Intellectuals of Hong Kong an open call to political action in Hong Kong during British colonial rule, Chen Chieh-Jen's action against the conditions in Taiwan during period of martial law or surfer culture as in Malibu Now, You Can Do Anything. A careful balance exists in many of the works between the observers perspective and staged scenarios in front of the camera from the collective Tito & Tita's feline screen-test Director's Cat to Shannon Te Ao's hypnotic reading to house plants of the poetry of Joanna Margaret Paul. Reflecting on her writing and films, Joanna Margaret Paul stated 'when my work is all laid out together the jigsaw puzzle of my life will show itself, I think…It’s oblique, but it’s all there.' – George Clark Biography George Clark is an artist and curator. Recent work includes the feature film A Distant Echo (2016) that explores myth, history and ecology in the desert and short film Sea of Clouds / 雲海 (2016) which is structured around interview with artist Chen Chieh-jen. His solo exhibition A Planter’s Art featured a new body of moving image works installed alongside a specially grown garden in Taiwan (June-July 2016). He has curated projects for museums, galleries, cinemas and festivals focused on expanding the histories of film and video practice globally. Through his work at Tate Modern (2013-2015), and in independent projects, he has curated retrospectives of Ute Aurand, Julian Dashper, Lav Diaz, Camille Henrot, Luis Ospina, Chick Strand and thematic exhibitions on Japanese Expanded Cinema (with Julian Ross and Go Hirasawa), L.A. Rebellion and Infermental, the first magazine on videocassette (with Dan Kidner and James Richards) among other projects.www.georgeandclark.com Image Credit: Still from Dysfunction No. 3, Chen Chieh-jen, 1983.